Lustful Looking

Easily understood, right?

There’s a lot of space to ruminate on what Jesus says about lustful looking and divorce in this short passage.

A lot.

The intertwining of our bodies and desires (did God make me this way?), the diversity of desires (now so widely uncloseted), the sometimes confusing space between pleasure and the taking of advantage over, the complexities of rightly escaping those situations where advantage has been taking over me…

And these barely scratch the surface.

Jesus was single. Might he have offered more to us about specific practices or about understanding what is human and what is lustful? …and what the fortitude involved in avoiding the latter looks like?

Actually, maybe he did. But the tearing out of the eye and cutting off of the hand seems about as destructive as anything we’re trying to avoid. (Again, did God give us these bodies?)

In the end, it sure does seem like wise discernment is required. And this discernment will certainly end in the establishment of boundaries, including “old” ones like marriage covenants, but also some more newly understood ones like consent for all.

…and the avoidance of excuse-making.

You have heard that it was said…but I say to you…

What is Jesus saying to you about it all?

Matthew 5:27-32

“You have heard that it was said, Don’t commit adultery. But I say to you that every man who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery in his heart. And if your right eye causes you to fall into sin, tear it out and throw it away. It’s better that you lose a part of your body than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to fall into sin, chop it off and throw it away. It’s better that you lose a part of your body than that your whole body go into hell.”

“It was said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife must give her a divorce certificate.’ But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife except for sexual unfaithfulness forces her to commit adultery. And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

Prayer

God,

The complexities of sexuality sure have broken open in the last half a century or so. I mean, I understand there’s nothing new under the sun, but for a long time, many of topics and practices didn’t see much sunlight.

So here we are. And many Christians dogmatically draw lines. Others have none. And in the middle are countless people riddled with shame, confusion, and unanswered questions. I confess it feels pretty easy for me to want to apply what has worked for my situation and desires upon all other people. I can find plenty of substantiation in the Bible to do so.

But then I see Jesus, the unmarried one who calls both for “Sin no more!” and “Whoever hasn’t should throw the first stone.”

So help me, God: Give me grace for myself and for others. Help me create spaces of love for all. Help me to rely upon your spirit as she moves in the lives of others in ways I cannot understand and in those situations where it seems clear that people are choosing to ignore it all.

And I beg: move us to a place in which we don’t need flags or denominational statements or whatever other ways we separate, but can instead rely upon trust and relationship, emboldened by true love between you and us. This seems so impossible. So help us, God.

By your spirit & in Christ,
Amen.